love
4 simple letters. A one-syllable word that can’t manage to make its way out of my mouth.
The word love to me is so important. So important, almost like a locket of my heart. If you have ever heard me say “I love you” or even “love you” consider yourself special. I have probably only said this saying to approximately 30 people throughout my life, including family.
I don’t know why it is so hard for me to say. Maybe it was growing up with friends who would say it to people they just met, or maybe it was because I grew up out of touch with my feelings. I’m not totally sure. But, I do know that watching friends meet someone new and then saying “bye, love you” when they had only met that day made me realize that to some people there is no weight in the word. Those people were the hardest people for me to tell that I loved them, even if I did. Since they said it so often, when I didn’t say it back it would hurt their feelings. I did understand that because they believed I didn’t love them but it was also hard for me to understand if they really meant it or if they were just saying it again.
It is easier for me through text than say, maybe because the other person can’t see the discomfort in my face through the phone or maybe because it is just letters versus something I am saying out loud.
Love is so hard because the way everyone experiences it is so different. Everyone has a different love language and I find it so fascinating. Once I found out my love languages everything made sense. If you haven’t taken the test to find out your love language I encourage you to because it helps you understand yourself more. I would say don’t look into it too much because it points out which ones are the strongest but that doesn’t mean you don’t have all.
Well with all that being said I want you to remember 2 things from this post:
Just because someone doesn’t say I love you back doesn’t mean they don’t. (don’t take it personally)
If you’re bad at saying I love you actively try and get better to let the people you know, that you do.
Bye :)